And So She Ate – When No One Was Looking

by Jessie Diane Wyatt
www.holisticallyyours.org

The client’s name and identifying features have been changed to insure privacy.

Kathy came to me in total frustration. She had gained a lot of weight in the last couple of years and besides that was overwhelmed and burdened with credit card debt. She was full of frustration, anger, and hopelessness. At 30, most of her friends were married and starting to buy houses. She felt so far behind her friends financially and didn’t like how she looked, and in her words: “I feel like a loser”.

We talked about both her weight and money issues and how they were related. I suggested she choose one for us to hone in on first. She chose to tackle weight first as that was most bothersome to her.

We talked about the idea of emotional eating and specifically about her eating habits. She was very self aware in that she recognized how she was “stuffing” in her anger at life, by eating and stuffing herself with food. She noticed she ate when she was lonely or feeling “low.”

I asked her to try to remember when she first turned to food for emotional reasons; for comfort. It turns out she had a history of this since when was young. She grew up in a household where her sister got all the attention and in her words “there was never enough for me.” Her sister got the better gifts, gymnastic lessons, and everything seemed to revolve around her older sister. Her parents doted on her older sister and Kathy always felt neglected or second best.

And so she ate – when no one was looking.

I tried to get specific with Kathy asking her to recall exact childhood experiences when she felt this lack of love, this “never enough feeling.”

We tapped on quite a few specific incidents where she felt unloved. One was a Christmas when her sister got great gifts and Kathy got shortchanged with skimpy gifts. She said the disparity was laughable. Her sister got glamorous gymnastic outfits, and more expensive well-thought out gifts. Kathy remembers getting a few pieces of clothing and a pair of earrings that she didn’t like – nothing special.

So we tapped on that:

Even though I got crummy Christmas presents while my sister got great ones, and I never got enough love, there was never enough for me, I deeply and completely accept myself.

Even though I didn’t get enough love from my parents, they treated me like a second class citizen, my sister got all the loving, she got the good Christmas gifts, and all the attention, I deeply and completely accept myself.

Even though I grew up without enough love or the right kind of loving and nurturing, my sister got it all so I had to turn to food for comfort and to feel better, I deeply and completely accept myself.

Then we tapped on the body points, saying “not enough love for me.”

Kathy and I worked together for about 3 sessions, tapping on various childhood/teen memories where she felt the pain of not being loved by her parents. Then we tapped on a few other emotional issues all of which typically led her towards food for compensating what was lacking in her life.

At this point, Kathy started to simply feel better about herself. She wasn’t as discouraged and angry about her situation. She was more optimistic and the next time I saw her, she surprised me and told me she had joined a weight loss program and even had a work out buddy. She seemed happy and “light”. Her whole attitude, the energy about her was different! A few weeks later, I asked her if she felt like there was any tapping left to do on this weight issue. She expressed concern that she’d get half way through the program and then quit. As that had happened to her before.

We got specific and it turns out there were times growing up when she’d accomplish something but didn’t get the full recognition or praise she’d hope for so she starting thinking “why bother.” And she started quitting on things.

To avoid this self sabotage, we tapped on these specific memories.

As I write this, Kathy is now finished her weight loss program – she looks great, feels more energetic and is excited to continue this as a lifestyle program.

She now feels ready to focus on her money issues, although since they are closely related, she is already on her way to improvement in that area.

I always like to finish our sessions by tapping on some positive thoughts. These were the ones I chose for our last session on the weight issue:

I love eating in a healthy manner and I feel great
I am the perfect weight and I feel healthy
I have all that I need
I inspire others
I feel good and I have lots of energy
I am a confident woman and people are drawn to me
I love myself and I appreciate myself
I enjoy respecting my body by eating healthy foods

Jessie Diane Wyatt
www.holisticallyyours.org

This entry was posted on Wednesday, February 24, 2010 at 5:23 pm and is filed under Latest, Self-Acceptance, Weight and Fitness. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.